[Content Warning- sexuality, sexual violence]
Sex (ED) Is Episode is ready! Thank you to our participants who openly shared with The HEAL Project, their thoughts and fears about sex eduction with their children–
(Go to http://heal2end.com/h2e/video/ to see this and other video(s))
So as a parent, I will continue to practice comprehensive sex education with my child. I have already been doing that, in a way that’s incremental and appropriate for my child’s age.
When my child has questions, I answer them in a way that’s educational as well as positive, and I take any questions that my child has.
My biggest fear is that my child might ask something that might feel it’s beyond the age that my child is and then struggling to make decisions about how to talk about things that might not be something that my child’s ready to hear.
The other fear I have is that my child will go to school in a place where they might not be as accepting of comprehensive sex education and then of course want to share the knowledge that they’ve learned and then that might make teachers and other people uncomfortable.
And so my fear is how will we address that. One thing I have done already is told his teachers about what I do for a living. And so just making them aware that, hey, this is a child that’s going to be talking about sex most likely, and in a way that might be different than how other people talk about it.
As a parent, I will just try to continue to be courageous and have conversations about sex ed with my son.
When he was five he asked me where babies come from and I was so polarized, I didn’t know what to say. And then he followed up and said, “does doctor put it in her?”, and I said “if she’s lucky”. Cuz I had to make it a joke and then I sent him out the room.
But now that he’s thirteen, I plan on continuing to be more courageous in that conversation, because he was courageous enough to ask me.
As a parent, I have talked to my twin daughters about their bodies, boundaries, and sexuality since they were very young.
And they are now 16 years old and we had discussions about sex, about consent, about what feels good about what doesn’t, about what they’re scare of.
And as a survivor of sexual assault as a child, I remember when I was seventeen and I held them for the first time that, the first thought I had when I held them was that I was terrified that they were gonna go through what I had gone through, and I was gonna do whatever was in my power to prevent that.
And I think the whole experience of being a mother to them has been to realize that I can’t, you know, protect completely, and that the only thing I can do is to have an open conversation with them, and also that if they do experience sexual assault or violation that it’s not the end of their life.
And I think when they were born and when they were small children it felt that way. It felt that if it happened to them, you know, I didn’t know how I was gonna go on or, hmm, yeah.
And I think that’s been the learning curve and the learning process. And what’s been amazing is just to see that, you know, we do have an open conversation about it and that they are joyous and comfortable in their bodies and love to talk to me about, you know, making out, and how happy they are and how good it feels.
So that’s been really great.
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